Incendiary

"People must of taken pity because I scraped together a fiver. I spent it on a Happy Meal for my boy and an extra large Fanta and we sat at a table in the corner of McDonald's. My boy was sulking and I couldn't blame him Osama I mean no boy should have to see his mum on the cadge like that. He wouldn't touch his Happy Meal and in the end I had to eat it for him."

I don't know why but that part really opened the character for me. A woman going insane upon the wreckage of herself, and the death of her family.

I'm terribly obsessed with this book.

Back to Black.

Current inspiration for the upcoming purgatory stage between summer and fall (class time ick), with a mood to match.

happiness.

I believe that this is something that everyone deserves, no matter what you have done or said in your life. For the past year, that's what I've found. Someone who make me happy in every which way, even when he's being an annoying little dick.

I try my best to be discreet about it, because no one wants to be the girl who is just obsessed with her boyfriend (cough cough almost everyone I know who is in a relationship). To be honest though, I'm not obsessed. We have a good understanding of things, and we are both too busy getting our lives on track to be obsessed with each other.

This month might be the only month where I get to see him more than two days a week, and actually it's just two days, and an evening. He's quiet here, and he even helps clean. He stays out of everyone's way. But, because it's a Monday, my roommates don't approve. They make him feel unwelcome. It's actually a pile of bullshit because I've dealt with them and their boyfriends for a while. They may not stay the night all the time, but it's because they live 5-10 minutes away. It's frustrating because they don't understand, and they just think I'm hopelessly in love, because I'm the one who has the shortest relationship so far in the house. Sorry I didn't meet my boyfriend my junior year of high school, and sorry I didn't meet my love in a retail store fairy tale. Everyone has their own time, and this is mine. They will never understand.

I also wish they would tell me whats up instead of posting passive aggressive tweets, or saying passive aggressive comments to my face. That just upsets me more. For example when you tweet that you forever wish you live alone, after I walked downstairs, I will like, comment, and RT that shit, because sorry I walked down and opened a couple doors. Ridiculous.

One even accidentally mention that they liked when I was alone, single, always home. No, sorry I am not going to sulk in my misery while being alone just so you can be happy. I'm sick of always doing what makes other's happy all the damn time. I try my best to be the best roommate/friend and I am just supposed to be there on call for them, while they are in love and hopeless and happy? I am so happy that they are happy, really. Everyone deserves it. But, I don't think someone's unhappiness should contribute to that.

I DESERVE TO BE HAPPY. I AM DONE PUTTING MYSELF LAST.

I am in love with my room. I am i love with my house. My roommates, eh. I think it's time to move on soon.

21.

I've finally reached the infamous 21. I was surrounded by people all day who basically wanted me to ditch my responsibilities and go get drunk. Not my style, but thanks. I did have a drink at dinner, but I drank it kinda quick, and I wasn't about to go down that road, so that was it. Lame, I know, but I worked all morning, and finals are next week. I can go crazy next weekend.

I am so grateful for all the people in my life. I got gift cards, eileen's cookies, headphones, and a record player. My roommates may drive me insane, but they really are the best roommates ever, overall. It's a Crosley, so it will probably destroy my records in the long run. So, all my rare finds will only played a couple times. I can't wait to finish my room, and build up my vinyl collection.

I went to the Museum of Osteology this weekend, for a bio project. It was in the middle of nowhere, but it was interesting, and I got lil something from the gift shop. I also went to Half Priced Books, for comic book day, and I found a Shakespeare collection, while my boy got a free comic book.

We also saw Iron Man 3, and for those who don't know the story, it's pretty awesome. For those who know the story of Iron Man, the first half was amazing, while the second half was shit, due to the "plot twist". But enough of that.

Here are my birthday weekend finds.

1. Bon Iver, Explosions int he Sky, Of Monsters and Men vinyl

2. Black leather journal

3. Hubler , Shakespeare collection

4. Skull bracelet, from museum

I am really pleased with my finds. I'm hoping that after finals, I can go thrifting/garage sale-ing for some cool things for my room. 

Happy Finals Week!

April obsessions.

This is my busiest month of the semester, with all my projects, tests, etc. coming upon me this month. I have at least 2 tests and 2 quizzes each week, not including all the papers. For all of you that haven't quite made it to college, here's my advice to you: Don't slack off in the beginning, because in the end, you will have to catch up and taking 19 hours per semester for 2 years isn't the bees knees.

But, one thing that keeps me partially sane is usually shopping, blogging, and music. Since I am extremely broke, and saving for my Hong Kong trip (which I will be blogging everyday for), I decided that music was my next best option. I have currently blocked UO.com, society6, and tobi.com.
I will open those up again in the beginning of May, when my birthday comes :)

So, here are my current music obsessions.

The 20/20 Experience//Justin Timberlake:I have loved JT since I was little, obviously, because which 90s kid didn't. But, I was never too happy with any of his albums. I always liked a few, but not all. This album however, exceeded all expectations. I never listen to radio music, but I occasionally will turn it on in hopes of his songs being on there. But then I caved and bought the album, so that solved that problem.
Favorite Song: Mirrors. This song is catchy, and it is very sweet. After watching the video, I wanted to die. First off, it's dedicated to his grandparents. Also the passing of the ring was my favorite part. It's so precious, and obviously referring to his marriage with Jessica Biel. They are just so in love and precious, it makes me want to die.

Era Extraña//Neon Indian: I remember that I had vaguely heard of them in the past, and I recognized some of their songs. However, after seeing them live at Lollapalooza (which I just remembered I never finished posting those. The photos are just lost in my computer that's why) I fell in love with them. First off, they are nice guys who just love to perform.   I remember how sad they were that their performance got cut short because of the rain. Since I've been weeping over the fact that I can't go, I started listening to this album again, and it is just so good.

Favorite Song: Polish Girl. The song makes me so happy, and it makes me want to have impromptu dance parties in my room. I love  listening to it anywhere, and it instantly puts me in a better mood, and it makes me think of Lolla. They have a little different sound to them, which I like.

My Head is An Animal//Of Monsters and Men: I saw them at Lollapalooza too, and they have that indie, but happy feel to them. I was slightly displeased when Little Talks made it to the radio, because then the little hipster want to be's appear, and I don't like dealing with them. However, their music is too good, and definitely going to be one of the first vinyls I buy (When I get a turntable one of these days).

Favorite Song: Little Talks. It's really hard for me, because I love all the songs on this album, but the video for Little Talks makes me love that song even more. The whole video is giant mindfuck. I mean for starters the director's name is WeWereMonkeys. C'mon now. Also the realistically paper cut out of the band was too cool for me. It basically shows them going on a trippy adventure. But when was the last time you saw an interesting music video that wasn't just singing, dance moves, and overly sexualized individuals?

So, with that being said, my current obsession is music, music videos, and making .gif sets of each video. If you want to see those, you can refer back to my tumblr. Just leave a comment with yours, and I will follow you, and you can follow back if you think that's cool. (I'm not really shamelessly promoting here right? I mean none of you, except 1 person knows who I am.) 

Oh, I'm also loving how music videos are finally coming back. By that, I mean non-crappy ones.

March wants.

1.

2.

3.

1. A ticket stub diary to hold my precious memories, instead of them being scattered all over my room.

2. Everything in this photo, but it is only advertising the rack. 2 months and sweet tunes will be flying out of my room.

3. A minimalist poster of Star Wars, because the decorating of my room is on it's way to being full fledge. 

(The first two are from UO.com and the third is from society6.com)

Moving forward.

Yesterday I had the pleasure of being surrounded by people I didn't know at a "party" event for someone who hates his birthday. I was also surrrounded by girls who even though they were little and annoying,  could easily kick my ass because they are enlisted in the army. I only liked a few of the people there, and just sat in the corner and observed and watched people. I didn't drink, because 

1. I don't know these people.

2. Not really into keystone (the people were like 18-19 but the straight edge - this is my first party- type.)

3. I was eating cookie cake.

4. I was driving, so duh, I'm not drinking.

Even though it was kind of awkward, a little boring, and a little weird, I got to meet some people, and observed others. It was a good night. Now, I need to focus hardcore on school, because I refuse to fail round 2 of my tests. I am going to do well meaning an A or a B on all four of my midterms so I can reward myself with more etsy finds and a stitchfix. I've been meaning to schedule one, but money is tight these days. I'm also very pleased that I have been able to wear shorts with tights for three days now, with not wearing my big ugly coat. 

In the midst of school, work, etc. I find myself letting things go easier. A little, because I'm a Taurus, and that part will never leave me, but I'm not mad at my roommate for pointless things she did to annoy me a while ago. I've moved on.